Why, are they ill?
sauron we need to talk about the black horses
Month: September 2017
To Melkor, from the long absent crocodile king ♠
[ wes!! it’s been ages i hope this is ok]
(( OH MY GOD IT IS SO OKAY. IT IS THE MOST OKAY. I HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO BREATHE *___* ))
JESUS CHRIST THIS HAS BEEN HIDING IN MY DRAFTS SINCE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2015
I HAVE SINNED, BORIS
I HAVE COMMITTED A HEINOUS CRIME FOR WHICH THERE IS NO ABSOLUTION
Couldn’t quite choose a species for Eöl, so here are a few. I want to redo the middle one, and also make a barn owl version.
Tonight is the night of birdverse doodles, it seems
tentaklingon when will you come back from the war
– Túrin Turambar
– Aredhel saving her son Maeglin after his Father Eöl attempts to kill him
@imindhowwelayinjune pleas advice on how write elf good? how i please write the elf but also good?
1) give angst elfs love angst how else do u pass the centuries
2) clothes!!! some say put them on – robes, leggins, jewels, a hat maybe with a dragon on – but i also say. have you considered taking them off? for shenanigans? and remember LaCE is more of a guidelines anyway.
3) add something weird in so we remember they’re not just fancy humans. @thelioninmybed likes twitchy prehensile ears. cannibalism, sometimes. not understanding human babies! or death. being weirdly good at scrabble.
put the ‘elf’ in ‘el[f]dritch’
4) make a joke about language. or trees. or loving trees so much you want to marry them. does lace let you marry trees? etc. remember what peter jackson forgot: elves are hilarious dweebs.
5) put in a canon reference so everyone remembers this is srs bsns. but also maybe a joke. like, someone is cleaning and is all ‘doom of the noldor more like BROOM of the noldor’ but funnier.
6) mention how pretty their hair is. THIS IS KEY everyone will leave if you don’t. also an elf doesnt count as hot if you don’t use ‘fair’ at least once. if you are struggling with this remember that black hair and grey eyes is always a safe bet.
7) if it’s noldor: CRAFTING THINGS. if you don’t know where to put them, put them in a forge. even if theyre knitting. which is a craft too. if it’s sindar: THOSE BITCHES LOVE TREES. talk about the woods and stuff like you’re jack london fucking a dryad. if it’s teleri: instead of tree marrying jokes, starfish marrying jokes. also never over the first kinslaying.
this is as many types of elf as i remember.
8) when in doubt, make them write letters to each other. what else do they have to do? they live forever good god what a chore.
happy trails, my friend
*Wesley, pen cap in teeth, scribbling notes with heretofore unknown intensity* ….dweeb… a pant…. brooms… cann…cannibalsmsm…HAIR *tripple underline*… puts the dick in…. tree….
OKAY I THINK I’VE GOT, THREE OUT OF EIGHT? Jesus god June where would I be without you. blessings, blessings on your house, your face *mwah* I am saved
@imindhowwelayinjune pleas advice on how write elf good? how i please write the elf but also good?
The Mordor Civil Rights Under-Overlordiat would like to remind all new subjects of Uruk and comparable intelligence that, while not explicitly forbidden, husbandry with toy-breed animals is discouraged under the laws of the Dark Lord – praise yet never speak His name.
While toy-breeds are deemed unethical due to the process and practices relating to their creation and their precarious health, they also represent an arguable violation of the Warg Rights Act of TA 1780 that grants full citizenship and equal rights to all Great Wolves and related species.
Our canine compatriots deserve the right to serve the Dark Lord – may He rule eternal – as equals, not pets.
“Ruar ruuf grrrRRaar, ruuf ruf GRrRRRRRRRRrrRRrrr RAAARUGH rurh nrrrrrrrrrrrrRRrrrrr RA RAR RARGH mmmrnf [hyena laughter redacted]. ARRWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooorrrrrrrrhhhh! Raurgh. Boof.”
–Official statement from the Gaurhoth and Warg Legal Defense Committee
*(No comment on record from the Bureau of Ethical Caragor Management, due to devouring the interviewer, as is their right. Good kitty.)
Ancient Roman gold and garnet ring, dated to the 2nd century CE. The band of the ring is granulated in the form of a victory wreath, and so the ring was most likely worn by a member of the military. Source: Trinity Antiques.
I was totally inspired by ewebean‘s serious hand-holding drawing, and I thought I’d draw some cell fluff? yea
You seem to enjoy terrorising Hurin’s son. What were you actually going to DO with him, if your orcs had brought him back to Angband when you ordered them to? By the looks of it seems more like you want to fuck him than you do torment him.
Don’t be an idiot, greycloak. I’m trying to spoil his day, ruin something he enjoys, shit on his dreams– the usual.
If he’d been captured as intended I would have skinned him alive in front of his father what do you think I would have done? Tsch.
this is what a hobbit would mug you with
not idly do the leaves of lorien cut a bitch
MisbehavingMaiar: Tumblr Archive 