ainuvore – MisbehavingMaiar: Tumblr Archive

If maia takes a hroa of human and a man eats said body, would this count as cannibalism? Like, a maia has a hroa that has a fully himan genetic makeup, all the proteins in place and etc.?

You’ve come to the right place with this question.

My answer is: Yes, it counts as cannibalism, since the body being consumed was human, while only the spirit inhabiting it was the immortal Maia. If you eat a natural human body, you’re also just eating the body and not the spirit (at least according to the Rules of Tolkien Metaphysics– obviously their are other interpretations available including some IRL ones that I can’t speak for).

In fact, I’d call that “guilt-free” cannibalism*, since no one really died and only one Maia was inconvenienced by the loss of a mortal guise. And furthermore, the meat should be entirely free of environmental contamination and probably won’t even be especially gamey since this “human” didn’t spend a lot of time in the wild, eating whatever it wanted. (Er, unless it’s one of the Istari. Then all bets are off– Gandalf is probably wicked gamey and stringy and I don’t recommend sampling him).

So it should be reasonably tasty as far as people-meat is concerned AND healthy! –Unless the Maia in question was just fudging the details vis-a-vis proteins and whatnot, in which case, I take no responsibility for the resulting “Mad-Maia Disease” or incredible indigestion suffered by the cannibal.

*Do not attempt to exploit this glitch for an “infinite meat hack”; Maiar can only go through so many bodies before they run out of power, and they’re likely to get very annoyed at you well before then.

admirable-mairon
replied to your post “lordnelson100
replied to your post “It’s been a million years since…”

….. I feel the need to ask what happens to creatures and things that he eats given his body’s properties xD

I am a bag of mysteries (◕‿◕✿)

Ialon is having fantasies about dat tongue. Sweating heavier than Tyelpe watching Annatar in the forge.

I’m flattered!

And it’s good for so much more than just scooping up cakes!

It’s especially suited to thorough, dexterous, constrictive, one might even say invasive, consumption of ~~phallic icecreams~~ popsicles.

And I can lick my elbow, which is neat.

I know that maiar have many uses as they can do prety much anything – They are good even as light bulb replacements. However. Are maiar edible?

Almost everything is edible if you’re big enough, in my experience

But there are two parts to any Ainu– the body and the spirit. Consuming a spirit takes a special sort of commitment, else they’ll wriggle out of you again and that is dreadfully uncomfortable. Unless you’re prepared to imprison them forever in the sea of your being, I suggest just eating the tasty outer shell and letting the houseless spirit flee where it will.