Ossë is a fish, I can understand his confusion, but thou?
Oh, my maker, left but not forgotten! How can you ask such things? Have you no more pride as a maia once of Aulë?
Aulë is father of the dwarves, lord of smiths… even his elf devotees wear beards! And are we not fashioned as mammals? Are we not beloved of wolves?
Why are YOU proud to be as hairless as mewling babe?
No need to be so dramatic, brother.
My ‘Aulëndil pride’, as it were’, comes from my love of crafting, smithing and the things he taught – not his looks. While the hair is… nostalgic, it is nothing I would wish to wear on my own fàna.
I have a fierce appriceation of beauty, which is why I pride myself in being as hairless and smooth as a gem or a well-sculpted marble statue.
Beauty in itself is a great tool. It gains the trust of the children faster, which makes it quite a lot easier to manipulate and decieve them.
I work with contrasts, dear brother. Our orcs are percieved as ugly and barbaric by the ‘good children of Ilùvatar’, our lands are dark and barren, Arien’s light never reaches us… And in a land filled with only wonderous, magnificent shadows, I am the only ‘Light’. They believe me to be their saviour – Someone kind enough to spare them, for surely someone this beautiful could never be evil.
It is like making them fear the things they love – the things they
trust. Making them fear the sky, the stars and their beloved, filthy
Moon.
The look on their faces when they realize that the thing they thought would save them is their true doom is the reason I am proud to be, as you put it, ‘as hairless as a mewling babe’.
Don’t me dramatic he says!
While tossing his locks and comparing himself to the sun in a darkened land!
Oh little brother, you are delightful.
Someday, the irony of shaping your life’s aesthetic around a storybook’s perception of good and evil will reach you. Maybe then you’ll grow some hair on your balls and they’ll stop mistaking you for a elfin child.
Don’t you patronize me, you big lump!
….. *sigh*
Forgive my outburst, brother – I have admittedly been rather tense as of late. Some of my servants, or our servants supposedly, haven’t exactly been easy to handle lately.
As for the hair on my balls… I have found that the people I take to my bed quite enjoy the fact that they do not have to bring shears in order to be able to find my entrance.
I imagine your lovers would have to bring all kinds of tools, and furthermore make sure that they don’t get stuck in that shrubbery you call ‘chest’.
Is that so? I imagine it would be easy to find even on a dark night amidst thick overgrowth– what with you lighting the way so generously for everyone.
…And I’ve had no complaints. Keeps them warm in winter, I say. Though if you’re comparing it to a shrubbery it sounds to me like you are in dire need of educating.
Let me know if you ever want to put your hands on a real Aulendur.
Eru: regardless of how anyone feels about it, things continue to happen
Morgoth: place your most powerful gems, jewels, and amulets into a box, you should sense strong energy emanating from within, then send the box to me
Manwë: just because i caused the problems doesnt mean i have the solutions to them
Míriel: i have to lay low for a while, by that i mean lay on the ground and not move
Fëanor: learning from mistakes is for people who recognise that they make mistakes. i dont give a shit
Fingolfin: it happens to the best of us, the best of us such as me, out of both of us im the best one, probably too great to give you usable advice
Finarfin: the “drama” fiasco is over, we learned nothing from it and nothing changed but we can safely say it is over for sure i hear that
Maedhros: its time to forget the mistakes of the past and start making the mistakes of the future
Celegorm: survival tip: you can sleep in an unattended birds nest for free
Caranthir: have to stop saying “how am i going to kill my way out of this one” everytime there is trouble going on, or at least not out loud
Curufin: instead of saying what you are all thinking i say what everyone would be thinking if they were as cerebrally intelligent as me
Finrod: you have to be cruel to be kind, no wait the other thing, you have to do nice things. phew, could have caused a lot of problems
Galadriel: some say killing people is the answer to the problems, me personally i think killing people is bad to do because im not a horrible monster
Fingon: tired of people always telling me go to hospital and that i’ve lost a lot of blood, its my severe head injury not yours stay out of it
Turgon: hey kids, i know youre struggling right now but im here to tell you, everything gets worse forever
Aredhel: dont speak i know just what youre saying, something about how beautiful and strong i am probably
Eöl: if someone betrays me i will turn on them with revenge in a second, sometimes even before that, its just the way it goes in this drama life
Maeglin: maybe i am the one to blame, on the other hand maybe every one else is the ones to blame
Luthien: looks like things are always happening once again
Turin: where people like you see a problem i see opportunity to create worse problems
Nienor: i am going to lay completely still on the forest floor until either things start going my way or i disintegrate into nothing
Elwing: “i’ll take this to my grave” – me, holding a bunch of jewels, gems and amulets
Sauron: there are few things in life that can’t be achieved with occult dark magic
Erendis: if you want something done you have to just forget about it and move on with your life, theres no point in expecting anything from anyone
Mîm: sometimes the only real friend you have is your countless enemies
The Silmarillion, as a whole: its all fun and games until its not that anymore
MisbehavingMaiar: Tumblr Archive 